Infertility has caused problems in my marriage

We are only intimate now to try to conceive-so the romance & closeness has gone. We don't really go out on dates anymore & often i feel like i have a roommate whom im trying to have a baby with--not a life partner. I think some of the reasons why we are drifting apart is that my husband is not good at expressing his feelings. He is likely just as frustrated & devestated as me-but will never talk about it. While I'll cry, discuss in length how im feeling, ive even seen a therapist-he is just quiet and keeps it all inside. I think we could work out or problems & go back to what we use to be-we just need to learn to communicate better and have a baby.

Things happen in life that we do not expect. I am 38m caNT HAVE ANY BIOLOGICAL children, however i am a mother. 12 years ago my fiance was taken in a car accident. 2 years prior i adopted a african american boy, who is the love of my life. We tried for many years to have children of our own. But god had a different plan for me. He gave us no children, to my man and left me to raise this little boy all alone. Guess what he is 14 active in sportrs and i since have adopted his brother who is 16. This was gods plan. You need to step back and ask god what he wants you do do. Ask him for forgieness and he will open up new paths for you. He is the maker of the road that we travel. Listen to him, deep down you understand the reason. Seek him and he will lead you

I just had to write! I just joined on the weightloss website but when I saw infertility, I had to give some encouraging words because I know all too well the pain this causes. Nobody fully understands until they have lived through it. My husband and I lived through this nightmare for 8 long years! We went through every test known to man so it seemed. We also fought because I was willing to adopt at any age and he wasn't. It truly felt like I was supposed to wake up any minute! Anyway, after the 8 year long wait, my regular doctor put me on glucophage for pre-diabetes. I always was a good 30 lbs. overweight. I had a good fasting blood glucose, just failed the A1-C test. Anyway, I became preggers about 4 months into taking the medicine! I had my first baby at 35! Yes, I would have loved to have had her at a younger age but man, I was so happy! We did it again when I was 38! They are 7 and 10 now, happy and healthy!

VicXen, I somewhat understand what you are going through with your husband. One thing that you need to realize, and he may not be telling you this, but he also is feeling like a failure also. Have both of you been tested? Is his sperm mobility and sperm count normal? I know my husband and I struggle to conceive and it has seriously turned into a CHORE - no romance at all. Don't get me wrong, my husband tries to be supportive, and we have a good marriage otherwise, but when all this high stress is involved, it just makes it harder on him to get in the mood, maybe...?? I'm sorry he's not more supportive with you, and I hope things work out. Also remember, most of us (myself included) are always wanting something we don't have - when I was single up through at 31, I was wanting so badly to get married, now we've been married 3.5 years, and I want so badly to have children......so I'm just saying we are always wanting SOMETHING that we don't have. Don't assume that once you have a child that your marrige will then be better. I hope things work out for you! Keep us posted!

I would REALLY give IVF a shot...I have had two successful IVFs. I mean atleast try before you throw the idea out the window..just saying. Hugs.